A feeling that I’ve been having for a while about a several things I’m involved in. The feeling you get where you put a lot of time, effort, and money into something for naught. Try to set something up, only for nobody to use it because they can’t understand how to change over to it from what already exists. Am I making any sense? Probably not. I just feel like I’m doing a lot of work for nothing, they don’t actually need me to be around, they can do fine on their own. If anything, it seems like sometimes my presence is undesirable, I just overcomplicate things with the way I do things. Facebook this, Gmail that, we need X amount of smart TVs, etc. etc., yet you want to do all your accounting and paperwork on actual paper? Then why am I here?
An example I can bring up is the new NTM wiki. I pay for it with my own money, put a lot of effort into it, and spent time that could’ve been spent living in the real world on something that I thought would bring a better experience for both writers and readers. Something without the ads, tracking, and spam of Fandom, on a self-hosted site. I look at what it’s become and sometimes I can’t tell the difference between it and the old Fandom wiki, there’s even tracking analytics added into it. Why should I continue to keep paying for or maintaining it if it’s just going to be the Fandom wiki but with a fancy domain name?
If you don’t actually need or want me around, just tell me, it gives me a good excuse to escape the sunk cost fallacy. Not that I think anyone cares about what I say, I’m just screaming into the void here. But what do I do? Should I stick with what feels like a dead end job that most of the time doesn’t even know I’m there to get the most of it as I can or ditch it in favor of a different avenue? Should I keep maintaining the wiki slowly burning away at what little funds I have for no benefit to anyone or abandon it and let it all resume on the Fandom wiki? For the former, there’s always the possibility of leaving later on or seeing it change, but for the latter, there’s no turning back.
Who cares anyway?